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Single People Thread

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Been single for... 9-10 months now, my previous relationship of 4 years ended in a not too pleasant way. Oh well.

 

First time I've been single and old enough to, in theory, enjoy it... but I can't.

I want the comfort of loving someone, while being loved in return. I want to make a girl feel special.

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Been single for quite a few years after I broke up with my gf of almost 4 years quite a while back. she was the only person I felt i ever really clicked with. Ive dated a few times and ive got fairly close with a few girls but I generally find that people are full of shit for reasons i will list below.

 

Ex-girlfriend (4year relationship) left me for an older man who used her as a sex slave, lied to her about being single - it turns out he was married with 2 kids. she wont tell me why she did it. I had a job, i had money, i took her out and bought her stuff. but it seems i wasnt old enough for her and i was already about 4-5years her senior - it happened so long ago, im more or less over it now but sometimes I still get depressed and angry about it.

 

First girl - we genuinely get on quite well, we have a lot in common and she makes great company and spend a lot of time together - next thing i know shes gone after someone else and wont talk to me

 

Second girl - Im unhappy with how the first girl turned out - manage to get talking to another girl who comforts me, she is great company and more fun then the previous girl and we get on well, tells me how people are full of shit but I can trust her. time goes by and we talk alot and get on really well. So i ask her out and she says no - reason being was because she was getting cosy with someone else while she was cuddling up with me, so much for all that talk about how people are full of shit and that i can trust her.

 

THIRD GIRL - Ive known her for a while but shes a friend of a friend and we used to talk then we stopped. At this stage Im still mad at the world and i dont care for company. she makes a big effort to be with me even though i told her I dont care for a relationship. after a lot of begging, I eventually relent and decide to give it a go. shes an alright gal, we have the same interests. we spend a lot of time together, she gives me the sob story of how shes always wanted me & this n that because Im an honest guy. etc etc, we fuck each others brains out quite a few times. we're all happy and cuddly and stuff. Shes happy, I think im happy then all of a sudden she doesnt want to talk to me anymore and is really avoidant when i make any attempt to contact her so i just dont bother.

 

 

Well. ive never been a pushy boyfriend, Im not a control freak and i geniunely get a long with everyone i meet. I speak to quite a few girls who say they wonder why im still single because im such a nice guy - even some of my friends say it.

Im either a complete asshole in disguise or im being trolled by the people  asking me why im still single.

 

 

at this stage, im past caring. Im very cautious and weary of the kind of company i keep especially if they're trying to get close to me. I wouldnt say im totally against being in a relationship, but I just cant trust nobody. Better alone and without the extra emotional baggage  

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Guest MollyMouse

Being single isnt so bad XD you have lots of free time ^w^ like with my free time im working on getting my copy cat emiru vocie back lol...so single isnt so bad...you just have to look at the posatives <3

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Single forever. I've never really liked anyone I went on a "date" with or anyone I was in a relationship really. My relationships last from a day to a week and usually don't get very far. Normally because I realize personality flaws and little games they like to play emotionally. Most gay guys act like frickin' bitches 100% of the time and get whiney if you don't fawn over them in whatever way they need. Then since I don't really understand that in people and don't play into any kind of power/emotional trips people set up they call me distant or frigid even though I'm always giggly and giddy about EVERYTHING IN THE DAMN YUNIBASU~! Ijustcan'tstoplaughingomg~. Anyway~. I'm happy being single. When I'm in a relationship that person usually wants to spend ALL THE TIME doing boyfriend shit and it gives me no time to absorb myself in other people's artistic efforts like music, books, and comics and shit! Texts are ridiculous. I'd be fucking sitting there trying to read and get all these texts and then have to stop and answer them or else get bitched at for "ignoring" him. WHY DO PEOPLE TREAT TEXT MESSAGES AS SUCH IMMEDIATE THINGS. Just cause it's sent and you don't get a reply doesn't mean it was read yet JesusFuckingChrist. Cell phones ruin relationships. Let's make that a mantra for this century. Also Facebook. Fuck dat shit. "OMG u dont got a FB? How will ppl kno im rlly datin u and not makin it up?" ASJNHAFJNHALFKJDNGHLAKNALKNGAKNGKLANGLKANFGJLNAFLJGNALNGA. WHY COULDN'T I JUST BE BORN IN THE SEVENTIES. 

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Single forever. I've never really liked anyone I went on a "date" with or anyone I was in a relationship really. My relationships last from a day to a week and usually don't get very far. Normally because I realize personality flaws and little games they like to play emotionally. Most gay guys act like frickin' bitches 100% of the time and get whiney if you don't fawn over them in whatever way they need. Then since I don't really understand that in people and don't play into any kind of power/emotional trips people set up they call me distant or frigid even though I'm always giggly and giddy about EVERYTHING IN THE DAMN YUNIBASU~! Ijustcan'tstoplaughingomg~. Anyway~. I'm happy being single. When I'm in a relationship that person usually wants to spend ALL THE TIME doing boyfriend shit and it gives me no time to absorb myself in other people's artistic efforts like music, books, and comics and shit! Texts are ridiculous. I'd be fucking sitting there trying to read and get all these texts and then have to stop and answer them or else get bitched at for "ignoring" him. WHY DO PEOPLE TREAT TEXT MESSAGES AS SUCH IMMEDIATE THINGS. Just cause it's sent and you don't get a reply doesn't mean it was read yet JesusFuckingChrist. Cell phones ruin relationships. Let's make that a mantra for this century. Also Facebook. Fuck dat shit. "OMG u dont got a FB? How will ppl kno im rlly datin u and not makin it up?" ASJNHAFJNHALFKJDNGHLAKNALKNGAKNGKLANGLKANFGJLNAFLJGNALNGA. WHY COULDN'T I JUST BE BORN IN THE SEVENTIES. 

Haha I feel exactly the same way :P

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Single pringle~

 

Well, Idk the more I think about a relationship I realize how much I  like being alone and independent.

my roommates have been in a relationship for 4 years, and for 2 of those years it was long distance.

but they way they cling to each other so much makes me think like.... I dont want someone nagging me to be with the 24/9

 

I want to sit in my room and look at tumblr and watch movies and kdramas without someone whining about how I dont spend enough time with them.

 

also, in my last (actual) relationship I realized I hate being touched, or physical at all, and I suppose that would probably be a hinderance for a relationship...

 

Ive been in a couple of long distance relationships but they fall apart rather quickly... Im not sure if im fickle or what.

IDK MAN.

I THINK IM RAD. AND MAYBE I JUST NEED TO FIND THE RIGHT PERSON ETC ETC.

 

but for now... I have a cat. and she's annoying.

but it's better than nothing.

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^ the idea is pretty awesome actually :D

 

Proud single over here too. I haven't find a single person yet i was interested into (neither sexually nor emotionally or mentally). And I like to be alone and having the whole day for myself. I guess that's also why I don't have many friends because too many people interferring in my daily plans would make me crazy. I also rather stay at home doing stuff than go to parties- except it's with one of my few but really good friends. But I'd hate to do things with a person who clinches me like a dog and where saying "I don't want to see you for the next 8 days" isn't so easy...

 

Or maybe I am just too egoistic, I don't know.

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also, in my last (actual) relationship I realized I hate being touched, or physical at all, and I suppose that would probably be a hinderance for a relationship...

I THINK IM RAD. AND MAYBE I JUST NEED TO FIND THE RIGHT PERSON ETC ETC.

I know someone who has a serious disgust for bodily fluids. Like, it was so bad that she even hated kissing because sometimes there would be saliva on her lips (possibly even her own saliva). She was the type to immediate wipe away the area kissed, even if there wasn't any saliva on her. I know her relationships suffered from it. Now she's married with a kid, so obviously she liked him enough to get over her disgust long enough to allow him orgasm inside of her. XD

So, with that in mind, take your time and enjoy your life until you "find the right person." There's no rush. ^_^

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^ the idea is pretty awesome actually :D

 

Proud single over here too. I haven't find a single person yet i was interested into (neither sexually nor emotionally or mentally). And I like to be alone and having the whole day for myself. I guess that's also why I don't have many friends because too many people interferring in my daily plans would make me crazy. I also rather stay at home doing stuff than go to parties- except it's with one of my few but really good friends. But I'd hate to do things with a person who clinches me like a dog and where saying "I don't want to see you for the next 8 days" isn't so easy...

 

Or maybe I am just too egoistic, I don't know.

I am the same case, apparently. Or at least similar.

 

I'm just not a very clingy and touchy-feely person so I may seem kinda distant and hard-to-get. I also don't like it when people get overly physical with me, I only tolerate it with my best friend. Constant messaging and calls annoy me as well, it feels like being observed and on a leash all the time. I love being alone and doing stuff by myself. I don't know. I'm happy being single. Sure, I'd love to find that special someone, but that person needs to understand me first and it seems that most people just don't :(

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Sooo, yeah, back in this thread =)

 

Been single for quite some months now (last relationship ended late march), but now I'm in some kind of a dilemma.

 

I'm quite honest always, and in some sort of scenarios, that's kind of a downside for me.

Right now, I've been online talking to a girl I met through some datingsite, and everything connects. We got similar interests etc, but the multiple dates we agreed to go on, were all last minute (well, last-day) declined by her. 3 occasions so far. (and yeah, she is real afaik, facebook shows her real enough and a friend of a friend of a  friend has befriended her years ago on facebook, so I guess that's makes her legit =)

 

So, the problem starts here. A week ago, I got mailed by a girl from another datingsite, and tonight I had my second date with her. Really great success, however, we share 0,0 common interests... She loves hardstyle, I love rock/pop. She loves disco's, I rather go to small bars/live shows. She loves typical beach vacations, I love sightseeing etc, and those are just the common interests. How much we talk, there seems to be no connection between the two of us.

 

However, the talking as of now is great, as is the sex (sex on 2nd date, yeah baby yeah), but now I'm concerned on the long run. 

 

The first girl seems like the perfect match, but the constant postponing of dates, makes it seem it's getting nowhere, though I think if there's going to be an actual date, we might hit it off bigtime

The second girl seems like a total mismatch. The only common thing I've noticed so far is that she has a child and is raising it on her own without the father, and I come from an one-parent family, without ever knowing my father... , well, that and the sex was good =)

 

since I've never been in this kind of situation (honestly, I'm glad if one girl showed interest in me, and now all of  a sudden there're two.) I kinda want your opinion on this kind of matter. 

 

Should I stick with the postponing one, or with the mismatch one? On the long run the first seems better, but what if that goes nowhere, I'm better of with taking a chance of the latter one.

 

So, short list of the girls

1: Cancels dates last minute, haven't met her irl, living 1hr+ away from me

2: No common interests at all, been on two dates within 6 days of knowing her, lives 15mins away, single mom

 

My mind says stick with the first one, you never know what it turns out to be. It might be your other half...

My feeling says go with the second one. Take the risk and see where it ends, you never know if the first one ever gonna succeeds...

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I don't come to this forum much anymore, but I figured I'd have to weigh in and say that in the long run common interests are the most important, even if its not the easiest path in the current situation. The way I figure it is that you owe nr.1 a chance to meet up and see where that goes, and once you've met up you will have a better understanding on where to go from there.

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Definitely try to meet up with #1 first. But in the end, it all comes down to what you're looking for. If you want your partner to be your best friend as well, it most likely won't work out with #2 in the long run. You'll probably end up being overwhelmed by your differences and will get tired of the compromises. 

 

So just try meeting with #1, see how that goes. If it's not what you're looking for, I'd actually suggest searching for a third option. I honestly don't think you'll be happy with #2 :/

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yeah, I all know what you mean, and it's also the one I want to continue with, but I get the feeling she's not so intoo meeting up with me for some reason. We already agreed 3 times to meet up somewhere, but everytime she cancelled the dates. Last Friday even 30 minutes before meeting up, so, I was already on my way to the meeting point...

 

So I don't really know how long I intend to 'wait' for someone, while I have another one that's 'ready to go', if you know what I mean. I'm not one to go two-timing on a girl (well, I kinda do now I guess?)...

Don't know if I have to ask it bluntly to girl #1 if she ever intends to actually go on a date with me, or if I should sit it out for another week of 2/3... I mean, if I hadn't had the other girl, there was no doubt and I could wait. But this kind of situation is a first for me...

 

Just talked with girl #2 again, and she wants to meet up again thursday, while I haven't gotten a response from girl #1 yet since yesterday on just a normal question (not one about a date or anything like that)...

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Girl 1 sounds pretty fishy~ cancelling dates right before the meeting time. ;o Has she told any reasons to you why she kept cancellling it?

 

For girl 2, I can't say much, would you be okay knowing she's having a child? (In my own case, I couldn't really stand it > _ < )

 

Anyways~

 

Linh is also still stuck in the single thread for life. :lolita_sad:  xD

(And oh god, I'm almost out of my teen-life. Is it even possible to stay single til now? XD)

 

tumblr_mx659qDlvT1r3rdh2o3_500.gif

 

Where are you~ www

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Girl 1 sounds pretty fishy~ cancelling dates right before the meeting time. ;o Has she told any reasons to you why she kept cancellling it?

 

For girl 2, I can't say much, would you be okay knowing she's having a child? (In my own case, I couldn't really stand it > _ < )

 

 

Well yeah, that was also my feeling about the first one. First two was because she had no time those evenings (1st one something came up, 2nd one she had to work early the day after). Last Friday she said she had a sudden money problems due to a sudden dentist appointment and several bills... I said that I could pay for that evening, but she still said no... Really don't know where that's going.... Guess I have to confront her with the question to get clarity...

 

As for the kids-problem with #2 (oh wow, I kinda hate the talking about women as if they're numbers xD)... I really don't know actually xD. I'm 29 myself, she's 26, and her daughter is 5. It's a plus that it's not a baby/toddler or anything, cause I don't know how I would handle that kinda stuff all of a sudden. I'm not opposed to get in a relationship in where there are children, but then again, I never had experience with something like that =)

 

bwaah, so, then you get in no relationships at all for YEARS, and then there's this kind of shit xD

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Aion, I can't speak for other moms, but I know that I was extra cautious about dating because of my daughter. It took a long time for me to [finally :P] introduce men I dated to my little girl because..... well, I was/am paranoid and over protective. What does the mom want from seeing you? If she's thinking long term, then you'll eventually have to tackle things like parenting styles and discipline. I learned the hard way that conflicting parenting styles is a major deal breaker. The other differences can be overcome with compromises (a vacation with sightseeing AND the beach or alternating who picks, for example). I'd suggest going out on a few more dates then asking her about it when it seems right (for all I know she might just like the time to herself and the sex *shrug*).

As for the first chick... those sound like legit reasons (maybe she couldn't afford the gas, even if you were willing to pay for everything else). She seems quite busy, so would she have TIME for a distant (hour+, you said) relationship? She doesn't seem to prioritize you right now. An ex of mine always said that you needed the right person and the right time for a relationship to work, having either of them be wrong meant disaster for the relationship. I'd recommend communicating with her about it; if she's honest with you then you might be able to work this problem out.

I wish you all the happiness, no matter who you may (or may not) end up dating.

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