Friends IRL and at internet - what's the difference?

[allisapp 303]

I'm sure all of us have friends IRL (8<<<), but as this forum is a big one, many of us have gotten some - maybe, hopefully - good friends. Maybe not only from here, but from all over the internet. But the question is how you would explain the difference between the friends here and at your homeplace?

Can you tell important things to someone who you haven't seen never face to face? Do you consider knowing someone else's face is more important than their personality? Can you tell the same things to your internet friends, which you have told to your IRL friends?

(PS. If someone didn't already know, IRL = In Real Life)

[LIDL 692]

Oyes. I got some.

Some internet friend i have are mostly gotten from friendster/myspace year xD

I was talked with them long enough about random things and things we likes/dislikes,

to see if they can reassure myself that they can be trusted and sincere.

Some took few months, some other were longer than that.

After that stage, to meet in person or talk something personal is easier for me.

I don't share personal things until i know someone well enough.

It's not like i didn't trust people, but i have to be careful.

By sharing my personal e-mail and Messenger, i have given a piece of trust.

And the rest will be given slowly, or not.

Also, i need to know if they will be O.K to hear me sharing my problems sometimes.

And if they can keep the secret,

and wouldn't lose control whenever we're having some arguments.

I wouldn't want to be a burden, you see.

Cos not everyone like to be the ears for everybody.

Usually there is this feelings whenever we talk, that we are "click" to each other.

That will be a boost for me, encouraged me to step further than just MSN friends.

I still visited online friends that i know for quite awhile,

whenever i am close to the area they're live in.

stay over at theirs or just out for dinner and movies.

Some even meeting my irl friends, and they eventually became irl friend as well.

But it doesn't always smooth sailing.

There was once some online friend that i have trusted been disappointing me.

Mostly using me constantly (not just once or twice) for their own advantage.

From as little as lost few CDs and DVDs or clothes,

cos they never return what they have borrowed from me.

To more serious thing like, you know, ching ching.

Though i didn't blame them, i take it as risks for befriend with people.

And i was just hoping it will be useful for them.

It didn't stop me from talking with new people, though.

[SUBLIMINAL 52]

I personally don't see the difference. I find I have more in common with friends on the internet, partially because we bond over these interests rather than at school or college or work. I don't feel that someone is less important or less of a friend because you met them over the internet. If that were the case, a dear old friend who has migrated thousands of miles away will never be the same friend again because the only means of communication you have is the phone or the internet.

I moved away from one of my old friends, who I used to go to school with, and we've kept in contact all these years afterwards via facebook and the telephone. That's remarkable to me. Because I'm so uselessly awkward over the phone. If we didn't have the internet, we'd probably not be friends anymore.

Additionally I met my best friend years ago on the internet. She lives in Canada and I adore her. We've been friends for years and have met many times and in person we're as comfortable with each other as we are on the net. Within minutes of meeting one another for the first time, we were hugging and laughing and sprawling out over a sofa bed watching movies. It was like we'd known each other all our life. Sometimes the lack of physical communication is bothersome, and you can't always pick up on certain neccessary nuances.

There are creepy/nice people on and offline. At least online, if you happen to meet someone creepy, you have distance and a computer screen between you. Meet someone creepy offline and you might have to see about getting a restraining order. (Which I also did with an offline friend. :X)

[Peace Heavy mk II 7200]

When it comes to friends I don't really think there is a difference. I find that being semi-anonymous helps people be most be honest than if they were in person, so you're able to get to know someone much faster and know things about them that most people in person wouldn't know or care to know more about. For example, using here as a reference, everyone likes Jrock of some sort. Whenever I say that in person, people are usually like "Y U CNT EVEN SPEK ANIME??" and the conversation is dropped with me looking like a complete weaboo fggt; but here, I'm more likely to get the reaction of "Oh, what kind? Have you tried ____?" and a plethora of conversations can happen from there.

I've also made a lot of internet friends who I feel I really connect with. Even though I've never met them, I still look forward to talking to them, miss them, and enjoy their "company."

I feel differently about internet dating, however: mostly because it messed up my life for a good 7~8 months, almost caused depression, and destroyed what little confidence I had in myself causing me to grow used to only being spoken to when needed and treated like an internet ronery pillow for more than one person

Sorry if this is incoherent. I've spent the last day puking my brains out and haven't had anything with nutritional value in me for almost 24 hours 8D

[TheBistroButcher666 228]

My Internet friends are the best and many of my IRL friends I have met through the Internet. I'm an overworking office drone so I don't have time to make friends the normal way!

I met my SO in World of Warcraft and we've been happily together for almost three and a half years! My WoW friends from Canada are pretty awesome people too! Fun as hell to hang out with and once I get my passport situation sorted out, I'm driving up to Vancouver to get drunk with those crazy bastards.

[Neon 6]

I have internet Friends becoming my real life Friend , and I have dated two of them as well

So I have no difference between

[ramrod 108]

Friends IRL are better DUR. You see them.

I have internet friends, and if they were near me in irl, we'd be great friends, but they arent. so real friends > internet friends.

[sai 868]

One of my best friends I met through the internet, but I think that if we would meet we'd be great friends even more. Anyway, I somehow find myself on the forum being more grown up than in real life, it's really weird :/ Maybe it's because I've taken the internet less serious bsns than before I was such a loser back then

[relentless 254]

Due to the integration of the internet into our daily lives and vice versa, I would say that there is practically no difference anymore between IRL friends and "internet" friends -- not anymore at least. This isn't 1995 in the days of AOL.

[MY BFF HEIDI 7]

Internet "friends" aren't real to me.

[ramrod 108]

^ OI >

You calling our cybersex over facebook not real ?

[LIDL 692]

The difference with them when we did mistakes,

IRL friend(s) : have the comfort for actually slap us in the face either literally or with words if we got too much or to remind us that we wrong.

Doesn't afraid if they must argue with us, just to open our eyes, so we can learn something from an event and never gonna fall into the same pit in the future. Which will be annoying but we will appreciate when all the storms over.

Most cyber friend(s) : they laughed with you, comfort you with kindest words ever, and involved in talking about somebody behind their back, listening to our sulks and complains patiently so we can feel better, even if it's actually we're on the wrong side. Cos they "don't want to make us feel bad."

But the very friends will also do the same thing to us. Talking shit behind our back, on how ugly we are. Much like "friendship" in Hollywood.

[D.L.S 11]

I think that they are both equally important, but I'm usually myself with people on the internet and that's hard to do with my friends IRL because we don't really have much in common. Not very many people around me are like me and I can say that I only know one person who is like me and truly accepts me and everything that I do/like and she is my cousin. She has her own life, her own friends and lives 45 minutes away from me so it is hard to always see her. The internet is the only way I can be myself until I can find people that I can truly be friends with IRL. It's been hard these past few months to be myself because I have not had internet, but hopefully today the internet will be connected like I was told and I can talk to everyone here that I used to and talk to and get to know more of you!

[AmberKid 0]

I've the most amazing ppl on the net and some of them have become the best friends I've ever had IRL too.

I mean...how amazing is it to meet someone online (on twitter, actually) and connecting so deeply that a few months later he crosses half of the globe to visit?

Exactly that happened to me. He's an amazing friend and last winter I spent the most awesomest craziest birthday with him. Me and my bestie cried bitter tears when he left...and what can I say...5 months of contact strictly over the net...he's back to spend all summer with us!

So net-friends can turn into IRL friends ande vice versa. For me, there isn't much of a difference. When it comes to trusting ppl, I follow my instinct...and it doesn't really matter, if that person is sitting next to me or on a different continent.

[Yasupon 18]

I've made a lot of internet friends over the years. A lot of them I met from live chats on a particular musician or person. A few of them I was very close with and felt like they were my sisters or brothers. I could talk to them for hours and hours nonstop because with some of them we could just talk about random things for hours without getting bored.

IRL my friends and acquaintances at school don't seem to like most of the things I like, most of them only listen to the rap or pop music on the radio, and have never heard of Jrock before, and they don't like various other things I have interests in. We still usually have the same taste in TV shows and the same humor, or sports and other stuff like that but that's about it.

[黃石珍 0]

I made alot of Internet friends when I was 13 or 14. Maybe I was naive but I trusted them really quickly and we always chatted a long time. When I was 16 and older I began to meet them in person. Well, first I was really nervous, but that feeling was gone fast because meeting them was kind of... meeting an old friend who you haven't seen in years, it was really naturally!

Now those are kind of my best friends, living on the other side of germany.

IRL I have many friends, too, who like many things I do, but I wouldn't say there's a difference between them and those I met on the internet. It's just... sometimes it's easier to get along with someone you met before, because you know his gestures and those things. But I would say, there isn't a difference between people I met IRL or on the internet.

[D.L.S 11]

Lolol friends irl. Those don't exist.

[Valicious 572]

There are a very few exceptions, but I feel that I'm able to have better conversations and be myself when I'm talking to people online. I don't have nearly the confidence when talking IRL about something of substance, and I usually end up tripping all over my words. Ideas seem to flow a lot easier when I'm typing than when I'm speaking.

I think there's something to be said for learning to 'connect' with someone online. If either of you move, the friendship and the way the both of you interact hasn't changed. I've had plenty of IRL best friends that fell out of touch when either of us moved away. Even with all the ways to talk online, they're heart just didn't seem in it unless it was face-to-face.

[usuxorz 30]

I tend to have better luck with my online friends than my irl friends. The main reason seems to be that I can find the kind of people I WANT to be friends with online because our physical locations don't matter; we can easily bond and become friends via the internet. I prefer the quality of the friend over WHERE we met. There is simply a larger pool of people online, more people of high compatibility but also more people you'd want nothing to do with.

I have recently decided that a group of irl friends are not worthy of the "friends" title. I will be dropping 5 of them, but that means the loss of at least 4 other mutual friends. These irl friendships were all fine until the day one of the guys in a relationship started "flirting" with me... he then started to lie about me to cover his own arse. From there they grew to resent the time I spent focusing on my education; they took it as a personal betrayal that I would pick to study for an exam over sitting around for hours with them. The main reason it took me months to make the decision is because I placed EXTRA value on them for being local. Truth is, I would trade all 9+ of them for certain MH members to live closer to me.

I never divided my friends based on where I met them, I always grouped my friends via level of trust.

[Cupcakes 55]

People in real life are scary. Yay for the internet!

[kai_desu 340]

Almost all my IRL friends I met online first.

@manda and I met online over five years ago, and we have been happily dating (and living together, I might add) for two years now.

 

I also hang with @Arithmetica (she lives a few blocks from me) when I can 8D; I have this habit to just stay indoors even though I live smack-dab in the middle of old Nihon Machi (or the International District, as the city now likes to call it because the Chinese bitched a fit.)

[TheBistroButcher666 228]

KAI IS MY IRL FRIEND AND NO ONE ELSE'S!

 

Also I left my ex that I met in WoW and now date a guy I met at a Reddit organized board game meet up!

[hitsuji-hime 211]

Friends irl - are rarely found, but later in time it's possible that they'll ditch you over for someone else. Rarely share the same interests, and are generally not the best people to talk to when having problems.

 

Friends on the internet - Tumblr specifically (for me personally), they are great to get along with, share the same interests, and are a shoulder to cry on when dealing with problems. They make incredible friends bUT THEY PRACTICALLY LIVE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE PLANET. ;w;

[Nyasagi 259]

Friends irl - they're rare to find, but once you find a good friend, they're fun to be with, you can go out and plan activities together.

 

Friends online - they're easier to find, especially with the same interests, they say nice stuff, but it isn't possible to get closer to them, because you can't meet them and they always value their real life more, than yours, so eventually they just leave.

[VisualKEIcrasher 25]

Online Friends - They're sometimes easy to find depending on what website you go to. It's actually amazing how you can have so much in common with a person and know that they're actually a real human and not a robot or anything.

IRL Friends - Most likely depending on where you are (for me), it's hard having friends that like skateboarding and anime. They always bash one or the other which I don't like but put up with.